Life goes on..

6 days ago, my life changed. as dramatic as it sounds, this is legit how i felt. with no preexisting conditions or family history, i experienced my first seizure. 5 days later…i experienced my second one. throughout this past week, i kept speculating how/why this happened. but honestly without being able to see a neurologist, i really don’t know. this whole idea consumed me — it’s all i could think about.

Then my mom shared 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 with me…”But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

i’m a strong believer in that everything happens for a purpose. while a seizure may seem to be a very unfortunate event (and it honestly initially felt like one), but i know that God wanted to show something through this. what exactly it is, i have yet to figure out.

i can speculate all i want but ultimately, what happened, happened. there’s nothing i can do about it.. what i can decide is what i’m going to do about it — how i’m gonna react.

last year was arguably one of the best years of my life/college career. i had great friends, got good grades, brought my car to school, was blessed with an awesome internship etc. nothing could bring me down. i’d read about suffering in the Bible, but it didn’t mean much to me. i just hoped i could combat it when it happens. well, (un)fortunately suffering came my way. but amidst all that has happened these past several days, i was really reminded of more positive things than negative.

i was reminded of how blessed i am even to be living this life. to still be “ok” even after my seizures. to have the opportunity to go to a great school, have caring friends, loving family, even a comfortable bed.

after last night’s incident, so many people hit me up asking how i was doing — some people i don’t even know too well. everyone openly prayed for me and cared about me. to me, if someone were to ask…what is real spiritual friendship? this is it. even though i may have only recently found my faith and started committing myself to church, i’ve felt the church’s love from day one. people ask how you are because they genuinely care. that’s love. 

i know that whatever happens, whether i’m ready or not, life will go on. i might as well make the best out of it. so thank you for everyone who prayed, thank you for everyone who asked how i’m doing, thank you to everyone who even wanted to ask but maybe was too intimidated by my serious-looking face. i really appreciate each and every one of your gestures. thank you for showing me that life’s too precious to be feeling down and that God is GREATER.

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